Baby Names

A few weeks before Val was born my dad finalized his 70s music playlist for my husband (who sadly missed out on the golden era of Americana). In Val's first days home from the hospital, Peter had this playlist on repeat (all hours of the day and night, because, newborns). As I nursed my baby and changed his diapers, I heard Jim Croce's "Rapid Roy" on repeat and thought to myself what a devilishly cute little brother Roy could be to Val. That song brought me a lot of pep and joy during those tiring first weeks. 

I wanted to get pregnant again immediately. I wanted Val and his sibling to be close in age and to enjoy the togetherness me and my Irish twin enjoyed. I wanted to have more children while my body and mind had the benefit of all this preparation at the ready. On the last day of 2024, Peter, my mom, and I sat discussing things we would have changed about this past year. Peter and I agreed, we would have wished that Val already had a sibling. 

But of course, God has His own timing. 

When we learned we were pregnant again, I was immediately hopeful it would be another boy. Immediately my mind was on names to make this theoretical baby feel more real. Where did it come from? I can't actually pinpoint the genesis. But I have been obsessed with the name Lee. A baby boy named after his mama. A gender-ambiguous but still fairly manly name like his brother has. Joining the ranks of many prestigious Lees. Lee Pace, Lee Strobel, Lee Corso, Lee . . . Harvey Oswald? Robert E. Lee? Well, okay. 

 

Unlike Valor, it doesn't mean anything particularly noble. This was always my sadness with my own name. Lee in the dictionary means "the sheltered side," which I suppose is nice. In old English, it meant field. Meh. Possibly "plum tree" in Cantonese, Mandarin, and Hokkien. The most common surname in Macau, so no points for originality, either. 

This is how Val came not to be named Bear, despite lobbying for that name the majority of the pregnancy. I found myself explaining out loud to a friend why I wanted to name my child that, despite the clunky animal associations, and I suddenly found (mostly thanks to Cocaine Bear), that those unpleasant associations overpowered my affection. Similarly, I struggle to articulate my affinity for Lee. But the affinity persists! 

Then the other day we were doing some housework and Peter turned on my dad's 70s playlist, leading inevitably to Jim Croce. I rushed to find Peter and exclaimed, "What about Roy?!" Peter just stared at me. "From The Office?" And it is hard to imagine how I could give my son the same name as Pam's boorish fiancé (even though it feels like an homage, since we watch The Office nearly nightly). 

Time will tell how our children come to appreciate our reasoning (or lack thereof) in naming them. I hope we make them proud! 

20 Weeks

It's starting to feel more real! Here we are, more or less halfway to meeting our newest member. Seeing him at the anatomy scan, having his gender confirmed, and also receiving reassurances that he is moving well, measuring well, and sporting a textbook heart rate, all these things were giant gifts. 

Since that appointment, I have been able to feel his little kicks, another reassuring milestone that my little baby is in there! (Although unlike Val, he is presently breech, and I could do without those kicks to my cervix.) I can't wait for Val to feel his brother's movements, but for now it still makes my heart melt when he lifts my shirt up and pats my belly going, "Hiiiii bebe!" 

Val is Peter's mini-me in almost every respect. This is something I have historically enjoyed, but now in my pregnancy perseverations I worry that we are setting up our sons to be Esau and Jacob--one favorite for each partner. Val's toughness, athleticism, problem-solving ability, and interest in how things work are all things I love about Peter, and things I want baby boy #2 to have, too. Where will we be if baby boy #2 turns out to be a neurotic, poetry-loving, homebody like me??? 

It is exciting to day dream about who he will be. How he and Val will be together. How our family will change. Peter and I joke that since Val was such a tolerant travel baby, baby boy #2 will see it fit to put his foot down and call us on these shenanigans. I try to anticipate other ways that he will be different--but how can I do it? Part of the fun is we will just have to wait and see. 

Doing my best to treasure all these little moments and not waste any enjoyment of this little baby's existence.