I warned my husband, "I am becoming radicalized!" Between watching The Trial of the Chicago 7, reading The Cold Millions, watching the news, and being an immigration attorney, I have sensed my simmering rage begin to bubble at the reckless, repeated, callous, and unrestrained violation of rights by governments. 

In particularly, I have been considering an Instagram post by @literally.noam.chomsky that articulated the following observation about inducing political change:

Many people seem to think that the process of political change through peaceful protest looks something like this: (1) People peacefully protest, (2) ?????, (3) Political change happens. In reality, it looks something closer to this: (1) People protest in a way the government is unable to ignore, (2) Protestors are unjustly beaten, teargassed, and shot at in a public setting by the government, (3) The general population witnesses the violence, becomes outraged, and sides with the protestors, (4) The government gives in to the people's demands on the threat of mass revolt.

The post concludes that emphasis on peaceful protests is really requesting that people become martyrs for their causes. This is partly the goal of one of the protagonists of The Cold Millions, a young pregnant labor organizer is distressed to receive bail, because she had intended that her imprisonment would galvanize respectable people to care about Spokane's anti-speech law. This is what Tom Hayden meant when he spoke about blood running in the streets--let America see the brutality! I guess this is what I mean that I cam becoming radicalized, that I am increasingly comfortable with sacrificing my safety or blood for what is right. 

But I don't know if that really works, you know? I want to raise awareness. I want people to know about famine in Yemen, about gang rule in the northern Central American triangle, about political prisoners in Senegal, about the injustices of the immigration system, about how scary and inhumane jail is. There is plenty of outrage and awareness out there already, but what has it done? I think about Pete Coones and Derek Chauvin, and I wonder what I'm doing with my law degree. There is just so much that is broken, and I feel really powerless. 

There are no answers inside myself. In church the pastor reads Psalm 2:1, "Why do the nations rage and the peoples plot in vain?" To my surprise I saw I had highlighted this verse, it must have been at least 3 years ago, but still I'm asking this, why? The psalm goes on to say, "He who sits in heaven laughs, then he will speak to them in his wrath." That same morning we sang, "Shake the mountains, break the walls apart, open the Heavens, Almighty God, You are Overcomer, by Your power, the oceans open wide, Your fire falls down, Heaven and Earth collide, Your power and Your presence break strongholds, when You speak, mountains move." The pastor asks us, "Have we lost our reverent fear of the power of God?"

I felt sobered but comforted leaving church. Awed by the reminder that my God decimates kingdoms. Convicted by the reminder that my God has already sacrificed his body to make broken systems righteous.